It's bad enough struggling through the London Underground system during the rush hour wiithout those two major annoyances: women who always get taken by surprise by the appearance of ticket machines at the exits and people with drag-a-bags.
This morning I was going up the escalator at Oxford Circus behind a mid-thirties woman and we just got to the ticket barrier and she had to stop dead to root around in her handbag for her ticket. It's a tube station! When you get to the top of the escalator it's going to be the ticket barrier next! I know you are a woman but please try to think ahead! Have you never been on the Underground before? Are you from Scunthorpe? Or New Zealand? Or Burkinu Faso? All underground stations have ticket machines. Be prepared!
Far worse, however, for the critical rhythm of daily commuting, are the drag-a-bag pullers. They pull their effete looking trolley bags along and then stop dead before every set of stairs or escalators to push the handle in so they can pick it up. Then, even worse, at the top of the stairs they stop again to pull the handle out! They are a menace! Mayor Boris should ban them on the underground. Firstly, nothing looks worse than a man with one of these. Are you really so weedy you can't carry a shoulder bag? Secondly, you shouldn't be taking luggage on the Underground anyway. Take a blooming taxi! Stop being so mean!
In reality drag-a-bags are for air hostesses and air hostesses only. Agent Triple P once saw 17 young ladies dragging their bags across the concourse at Hong Kong airport, looking very dinky. A whole Cathay Pacific 747s worth of them. Rubbery!
